One thing people sometimes say when you suggest replacing self-criticism with self-kindness is that they see it as a weakness and that their inner critic ‘keeps them up to the mark’ as it were. But in fact self-kindness allows us to forgive our mistakes and move on more freely rather than being stuck in the same old patterns of behaviour. Mindfulness doesn’t mean we let ourselves off the hook! In fact we may feel our shame or regret very strongly. But it gives us the means to begin to move on from it rather than getting caught in the repetitive cycle of self-recrimination that may simply add to the negative self-view we may already hold about ourselves..
